So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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