Will you blow on my dice?
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
