pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Randomize
