im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Randomize
