After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
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