well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize