i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
