We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
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