it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
I don't know what's worse the the fact he has worn a protective cup for last 3 years in fear of being kicked in the balls. Or the fact that the one day he decides to throw caution to the wind and doesn't wear it and actually gets kicked in the balls.
Who in tha hell do u hang out with?
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
