Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
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