Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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