It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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