If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
