my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
