I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Randomize
