Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
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