were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
Randomize
