I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Alive.
So much puke
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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