You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Randomize
