he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
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