We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I'm facebook/twitter stalking the guy I just slept with as he's passed out next to me. What a time to be alive...
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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