You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
