So gin and wine won't be happening again
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
