69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
Randomize
