so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize
