I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
I wish life had little blips of pornography
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
