So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
