My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
