She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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