Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
