Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Never let your siblings swipe right.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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