I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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