We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
