If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Randomize
