the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
