he was CRYING into my vagina
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
