careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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