At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Of course I have a pirate flag
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
