Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Just rolled over and realized my vodka goggles are not as functional as my beer goggles
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Randomize
