we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
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