i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize
