so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
They have beer where we have blood.
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize