i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Randomize
