it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Randomize
