I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
