Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
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