well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
Randomize