Screwed.edu
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Randomize
