: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I think your dad took our porno
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Randomize
