Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
