turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
