is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
whose parrot is this?
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Randomize
