Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
